Reports indicate that Christmas Shopping deteriorates your mental stability!

HORRORSCOPE (11-30-09) Live it up today---fly to another country for breakfast, then sail back home on a homemade raft. If you think you still love humanity, do me a favor and go Christmas shopping---then get back to me...

TODAY'S FUN FACT: The Cavemen who discovered fire were in fear of it, while the young Cave Children were fascinated with fire and often played with it.

Elvis Impersonator abducted by aliens on a rural country backroad!!!

HORRORSCOPE (11-29-09) Try canning as a hobby but keep a lid on it. When pushed into a corner, circle your enemies. Stay away from wide open rural areas and isolated country roads today, as the chances of "human hunting" alien craft sightings will increase as the evening approaches---Elvis impersonators are especially at risk...

TODAY'S FUN FACT: The first alien abduction occurred in 1961. Once the made for TV movie about that event aired in 1975, humans were being abducted by aliens at an alarming rate, especially during rerun season...

Frazier the Turkey's diet was one person a day!

HORRORSCOPE (11-26-09) Surprise company might pop by your place today---surprise them by not being home. Dysfunction is NOT unique to your family. Eat until you lose consciousness. Follow your hunch but sit up straight. A "New York minute" is 44 seconds long.

TODAY'S FUN FACT: Frazier, the world's largest turkey, was 27 feet tall, 13 feet wide and weighed 2,036 pounds! It fed the entire town of Fourhead, Iowa on Thanksgiving in 1967.

Plenty of room for you---at the Skeleton Hotel!

HORRORSCOPE (11-22-09) A printing press is a possible money making venture. Furnaces are full of hot air. Droughts may inhibit cash flow. I would still bet the farm that the Nigerian Prince emailing you for money in exchange for bigger money, is a fraud---just a hunch. Drop aplomb with assurance. Careful as to not cause a sore...

TODAY'S FUN FACT: The famous "Catacombs of Chlamydiah" date back to the 2nd Century but were only discovered in 1900!

Rare Photo of Jesus and his pet Dinosaur, Hymie!

HORRORSCOPE (11-21-09) Make a dog your pet project. Travel is the best way to get somewhere else. Isolation is more effective by yourself behind closed doors. You are prone to make sudden changes that concerns your livelihood, don’t take this lying down. Plan a schedule for your next agenda.

TODAY'S FUN FACT: Jesus had a pet dinosaur named Hymie.

HAPPY "PET A PANTHER" DAY!

HORRORSCOPE (11-20-09) As you know, in most areas of the country, today is "Pet a Panther Day." Take your time while making an impulsive decision. Take stock of your soup recipes. Tomorrow will be today's past and yesterday's future. If you feel you can't make it to the finish line, turn back at the half-way mark. Don’t be a heal and send money to a TV evangelist...

TODAY'S FUN FACT: "Pet a Panther Day" was started by President Theodore Roosevelt and declared a "National Day of Observance" on November 20th, 1908.

HORRORSCOPE (11-20-09) Take your time while making an impulsive decision. Take stock of your soup recipes. In some areas, today is "Pet a Panther" day. Tomorrow will be today's past and yesterday's future. If you feel prankish today, do not take paint balls to work. If you feel you can't make it to the finish line, turn back at the half-way mark...


TODAY'S FUN FACT: